drake: babe, oh my god! i just heard the news! congratulations, sufjan!!
sufjan: You Mean To Say “Academy Award Nominee Sufjan Stevens”
drake: hm? what’s that?
sufjan: From Now On I Will Only Answer To My Full Name Which As You Know Is Academy Award Nominee Sufjan Stevens
drake: …you know on any other day i’d gently and politely refuse that request but given the circumstances i think it’s actually warranted… academy award nominee sufjan stevens ;)
sufjan: Thank You Aubrey For Indulging My Whimsy I Knew There Was A Reason I Married You Besides The Opportunity To Go Ham On The Wedding Registry And Collect Kitchen Aid Stand Mixers Like Pokemon
drake: no problem, babe. so… what are you up to? looks like you’ve reorganized the den a little bit
sufjan: Yes I Have Transformed Our Living Space Into A Miniature Replica Of The Dolby Theatre The Better To Practice My Academy Awards Performance As You Can See These Couch Cushions Form The Stage And These Various Stuffed Animals Are My Captive Audience
drake: oh cute… wow that’s… that’s a lot of stuffed animals… and they all have nametags…
sufjan: Yes Seated Ajax The Centre Aisle Are A Flamingo And A Giraffe Who Symbolize Saoirse Ronan And Greta Gerwig Respectively
drake: aww, right! it says, “Hello My Name Is Greta The Giraffe”
sufjan: I Plan To Begin My Performance By Descending From The Rafters In A Sturdy Harness And Sprinkling A Cloud Of Glitter Above Ronan And Gerwig So As To Bless Them And Their Movie Film The Lady Bird
drake: i don’t… know… if greta and saoirse would like that very much…
sufjan: But Aubrey It’s Whimsical
drake: that may well be but i’d still clear it with them first. glitter can be messy.
sufjan: Right Any Way Next I Will Hold My Stainless Steel Banjo Aloft And Strike James Franco Over The Head With It
drake: sufjan! no!
sufjan: He Deserves It
drake: do NOT grievously injure james franco!
sufjan: Can I Injure Him Not Grievously But Just A Little Bit
drake: no! wait. oh my god… is that why… is that why this beanie baby hippopotamus is lying here with all its stuffing leaking out… and a tattered nametag on its chest that says “Hello My Name Is James Idiot”
sufjan: I Cannot Explain My Poetry Often
Ghibli Squad
2017 Happy Valentine’s Day :-)
Hey, this post may contain adult content, so we’ve hidden it from public view.
by Sarah Ryhanen, on Flickr
one time i got a sample from the tea store at the mall and as i walked away the guy said “tea you later” and then his coworker smacked him
Me, waking up my children in 2035: “Get woke, Bae and Thot, it’s time to vore breakfast!”
Okay friends, I really need y’all to come through with this.
My mom recently started a baking business called Roxie’s Baked Goods (black owned businesses, hollaaa)! As the name suggests, she bakes pastries, cookies, and breads that are like honestly phenomenal (I’m biased as her daughter, but man I’ve eaten her cooking my whole life and can say it’s never once disappointed me). Last week she did a round of meetings and interviews with a company that’s willing to back her financially, but she needs to show them that this can/will be successful. So she’s made a facebook page - her goal is to get to 1,000 likes in two weeks.
My mom doesn’t know I’m sharing this on here but y’all…I want this for her. I really want this to be something she can do. She’s 47 years old and is JUST now being able to follow her dreams and it kills me that life and circumstances have kept her from doing so for so long.
Again, the facebook page for Roxie’s Baked Goods is here, please give it a like! You don’t even have to receive updates from the page on your newsfeed, but please. Help my mama out. <3 I love her so dearly and she’s working so hard. I wanna show her support as she starts this venture! Right now she only delivers goods in the Twin Cities, MN area, so if you live around here are interested in supporting her and your tummy, let me know. :)